Thursday, September 07, 2006

Where the Sun Don't Shine

The neighborhood hoodlums wrote this on the alley side of our garage. I am less upset by it than one would think- I mean, good god, someone vandalized my property by writing semi obscene words on it with a Sharpie. Upset? Not really- Mr. T slapped a few coats of house paint from one of the many cans in the basement and voila! Good as new. Puzzled? Yes, a little. Who on earth would write such a bizarre thing? And why? What must the little bugger look like? I'm thinking it's probably a boy- with apologies to male readers who will take offense. I'm thinking 11-14 in age. I'm thinking too much time, not enough supervised time. But, maybe I'm way off base. Maybe it's some frustrated soccer mom who's out to prove she's in charge of her life. Maybe she commandeered her minivan through our narrow alley in the dark of night (well, not too dark- what time does Starbucks close?)and turned off her headlights, rolled down the driver's side window and leaned out and quickly left her mark.

I was also a bit clueless as to the meaning of the term. I searched for
a definition and got one. Again with the why? Was the perp "tagging" our house? Trying to tell the neighbors something? Is it the urban equivalent of

Maybe I'm TOTALLY misreading it and it's a very embarrassing spelling and grammatical error. Maybe it's supposed to read "But, Cherry!" Hey, the kid coulda been a big SE Hinton fan- you know, of The Outsiders fame? Cherry Valance, watching sunsets that are the same, whether you're a Greaser or a Soc- "stay gold, Ponyboy".

Or, it could be some Beavis and Butthead prototypes on dirtbikes, riding up and down the alley. "Heh-heh. Beavis! I just wrote butt." "Heh heh. Now write cherry."

I taught middle school for 5 years. Do you think it shows?


Blogger zygote daddy said...

I know what that kid needs...more time in Spanish class! Nothing works better to drill in good grammar like learning a foreign language.

9/08/2006 9:09 AM  
Blogger harpo the dog said...

who knew the word butt had so many meanings, its seems i am missing a whole side to my vocabulary. we are getting the tagging too in our alley.

9/08/2006 9:32 AM  
Blogger Teacher lady said...

I gotta tell ya, even when you teach sex ed for a living, you STILL learn something every day. While the concept of "butt cherry" certainly makes sense, I had never really heard of (or thought of) it before. And also? Look out for all sorts of new pervs at your place. (Your blog, not your house.)

9/08/2006 2:43 PM  
Blogger happychyck said...

Thanks for the new term, and as much as I could have lived without that enlightenment, I'll bet anything I hear that term a lot more often now that I know of it.

I don't blame you for being perplexed as to its reasoning and origin. It's so random!

9/09/2006 12:06 AM  
Blogger Wendy Boucher said...

I'm glad that you have a sense of humor about the vandalism. At this point, what else can you do but laugh at it? It might be different if the same vandals return. But at least they have taught me a new phrase.

9/09/2006 10:13 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Bluebird said...

It definitely shows that you taught middle school for 5 years! I've often thought they should do a reality show about life in a middle school. Most people probably wouldn't believe how insane it is.

9/10/2006 10:00 AM  
Blogger Mister Teacher said...

I still remember the day I lost my left nostril cherry...

9/11/2006 6:18 PM  
Blogger liberalbanana said...

Oh my god, this was HILARIOUS! The image that was formed in my mind of a soccer mom writing "butt cherry" on your garage almost made me spit out my tea at the computer screen. Great post.

9/12/2006 9:35 AM  
Blogger Mr. Lawrence said...

Well, "Buckcherry" is a band ... "Black Cherry" is a song by Goldfrapp (and the name of the album), "big cherry" wouldn't make sense ... nope, nope, definitely the work of morons (don't you wish for clever graffiti artists? Maybe some Blake? Proust? Something smart and thought provoking? I know I'd appreciate that ... just not on my car ;-p)

9/12/2006 8:58 PM  
Blogger marsha_tm said...

Wow- I learn something new everyday. I would have guessed that this is the wound you suffer when you fall off your skateboard.

9/12/2006 11:19 PM  
Blogger Pendullum said...

Learn something new everyday...
No that Butt Cherry will come up in cocktail conversation...
But maybe on the soccer field?

9/13/2006 8:32 AM  

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